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Jane
- Dec 31, 2018
My Curtains
31.12.18. When I walk into my room during the day, I find my curtains drawn together with clips and the room in darkness. Mum has been here again. Time and time again I have explained to her that I like to leave the curtains open during the day to let in the sunlight. 'We can draw the curtains at night, when it’s dark', I explain. She seems to understand, smiles and nods her head. But the next day the room is in darkness once again. I’ve started hiding the clips under the pil
Jane
- Dec 29, 2018
The Rubbish Bin
30.12.18. I bring mum some egg and challah with some rocket from the garden. I gently wake her up and she looks at me with surprise. I dreamt about you, she says in awe. I dreamt about you. If not for you, I wouldn’t be alive. She tells me this most days. I smile. I ask her what she dreamt about but she’s already busy eating her food. I give her some hot water. She kisses my hand and thanks me again. What did you dream about? I ask again, curious. What a beautiful person you
Jane
- Dec 28, 2018
The Washing
29.12.18. Shabbat morning. Mum's holding the tub full of washing. What shall I do with this? She is tentative, confused. I am busy at my desk trying to get some work done and have no patience. Take it outside to the balcony, I answer. She doesn’t seem to understand and I know this, but I'm not feeling kind at the moment. She goes to Yasha and asks him. Where is the balcony? Yasha: Ask Jane. She comes back to me, at the desk, still holding the tub of washing. And asks again. I
Jane
- Dec 24, 2018
A Kiss on the Head
25.12.18. I sit at my desk reading mum’s stories from Auschwitz, and about a lady called Yetka Salzberg. Her daughter Simone had asked me to send her any info I could find about her mum’s past, as her mum and my mum were fellow Auschwitz inmates. As I read, I notice mum slowly stepping around me looking for a dirty plate to wash or a piece of rubbish to claim. I can feel her behind me, standing quietly, thinking her slow muddled thinking, and then she leans over and kisses me
Jane
- Dec 18, 2018
Hema, Mum and Mali
19.12.18. I took mum Hema and Mali to our hut near Warburton. I picked them up from Chehan’s place and off we trotted. Mum was very excited and also overwhelmed with all the things needed to be done in the hut. She kept saying There’s a lot to be done... great neglect. And I keep answering her: It was even more neglected when you and Adolek were in charge. Gil and I have worked so hard decluttering the whole place and cleaning, cleaning, cleaning … Mum and Hema have got on li